Your Biggest Critic

Are there actually doubters in your life other than yourself?

As promised last time, I will be writing about how I moved quickly from individual digital brush licenses to bulk licensing for studios like Disney, Sony, and Weta Digital. But today, I wanted to send out this quick food-for-thought nugget on the subject of self-doubt. I was on a much needed vacation last week and skipped writing altogether, so this short piece will serve as a small detour on the way to this week’s full issue.

Here is a question I want you to ponder today: who is the person (or people) in your life expressing doubt about your ability to succeed in your creative or business pursuits?

Next, ask yourself this: are these doubters well-informed when it comes to these pursuits of yours? Are they experts? Do you really value their opinions?

And, are they actively standing in your way?

Be very honest with your answers. Write them down if it helps.

My first guess is that most of you will struggle to write down even a single name. For a few of you, there might be a name or two. And if there are, my next guess is that these are not names of people who can actually stop you from moving forward. Not really. Because if you’re reading this newsletter, then my third guess is that you are already the kind of person who is creative enough, capable enough, and resourceful enough to push past a few Negative Nancies.

It’s usually the case that we imagine there are numerous naysayers out there telling us we can’t do something when in reality, they are just shadows of ourselves. Our own self doubt not only creates these distortions, but is usually a distortion, itself; a distortion of the truth. As you know from the CBT experiment I demonstrated last time with the launch of my brush business, it is very easy for us to generate powerful illusions of obstacles and imminent failure in our minds. But it is equally easy to prove these to be false when they are challenged, unemotionally, with hard facts.

So, are you your biggest critic? Are you your ONLY critic?

I have often played that part in my own life. But I have been lucky enough to catch myself in this behavior and occasionally flip the script, especially in a few moments when it mattered: asking out my wife, quitting my day job to start my illustration business, and putting my eggs into the digital brush basket.

How? By exposing the lies I was telling myself. And not always on my own; friends are very useful here. They can be our biggest cheerleaders. Their confidence in us is not always misplaced, though we may think it to be; in fact, they often see us as we really are and their belief in us comes not only from love and admiration, but also from a clear appreciation for, and understanding of, our best traits, unclouded by the self-judgment we alone can manufacture.

If you find that yours is really the only voice casting doubt when it comes to following your ambition, then be a better friend to yourself– one who acknowledges your most positive qualities and unique strengths. It might be a cliché but sometimes you do really just need to get our of your own way.

See you in a few days, and thanks for reading, as always.